The Perfect Love Story

I was doing my devotions the other night, after a particularily stressful day, when I realized something. I had just finished my Bible reading (Luke 9: 18-28) and it was talking about how Jesus is in the drivers seat of my life and how we should not run from suffering, but embrace it. So, I had just finished reading that in my Bible, and I was sitting down with my journal and my lovely purple gel pen. I was re-capping my day, when I had one of those aha moments. It's like a moment where everything finally clicked and I got it. I was journaling about something I found, about how pain is pain. Every situation is unique. Like no one can know exactly how you're feeling because they have never been there. I found this quote on a website earlier that night (Before I was journaling) and I hope it sort of sums up what I'm trying to say. It says "Don't ever let anyone tell you that it's wrong or even feel guility for feeling what you are feeling. Yes, there are some who have it worse. But right now... what you feel is all your own." So I was journaling about that quote, when something hit me. My pain is all my own. No one gets how I'm feeling because no one has been there. yeah, it might not be the biggest thing in the world. But it matters to me. Just like what you are feeling could be way different then what I feel, but neither one is more importent. Pain is pain, and right now, the pain you're feeling matters to you just like the pain I'm feeling matters to me. I also realized that my pain matters just as much to God as that girl over there or that boy. It's not that somebody's pain is more importent. My pain matters to God because I matter to God. He cares about the things that hurt me, because He cares about me. He's going to be there for me, no matter what. He created me and He loves me, so much. Ok, my pain might not be the worst thing in the world. It probably isn't. There are a lot of worse things that are happening right then. But this is my pain and this is my hurt. It's hurting me, and that's hurting God. Yeah, there is so much going on in this world. Children are starving, parents are fighting, teenagers are trying to find that love they never felt when they were growing up. Bad things are happening and there are lots of things that are hurting people. What I'm going through might seem really un-importent compared to all those people. But you know what? What I'm facing matters to God. Even with all that stuff going on, what's happening to me matters to God. Does that not just blow your mind? Even with everything going on in this world, You and what you're facing matters to God. and, you know what? That hurt you feel is no less importent then the hurts of millions of people around the world. Your pain matters to God because YOU matter to God. My pain matters to God because I matter to God. I find it strange to think that with everything going on in this world, that God would still have time to care about those things that hurt me, that are probably so tiny compared to some of the other things people are going through. But what I feel matters, because I matter. I totally love just saying that, because it's true. I matter to God. He loves me and He delights in me. He has written my name on the palm of His hand and my laughter echoes off of his heart. He carries me when I don't have strength and He holds me when I cry. He's not leaving me alone to do this. He is with me, always. He does this all because He loves me, more then I could ever imagine. He loves me. I matter. Someone like me matters to the KING OF THE UNIVERSE!! Did you get that? Someone like you matters to God. He's not going to leave you out there alone. He always has time for you. Your hurt matters to God because You matter to God. What you're feeling matters because you matter. Do you love hearing that as much as I do? It's like, no matter what happens to me, if it hurts me, it matters to God. If I care about it, so does He. Why? Because I matter. Because you matter. To the KING OF THE UNIVERSE, we matter. If it matters to you, it matters to God. Because He is crazy about you. He loves you and He is never letting go of you. When He died on that cross, He thought of you. He thought of you, and even though He could have saved His own life, He didn't. He died, because He loved you so much. Isn't that the perfect love story? You matter to God. He loves you more then you will ever know. He is never too busy for those things that matter to you. He is always there, and He is never letting go. Do you believe that, really believe that? Do you believe that God could love someone like you? That you matter. He loves us. More then we will ever know. We matter. He has picked us and chosen us and taken us just as we are, broken and bleeding and at the lowest of lows. He has found us there, and He loves us anyways. He know's we'll mess up. He know's we're only human. He get's that we'll make mistakes sometimes. But no sin is too big for God to forgive. Nothing we could have done is so bad that God won't take us back, that He won't run to us with open arms when we come home. He loves us. Oh How He Loves Us.

What Can I Give?

Have you ever had those moments when you stare at a blank screen and wait, hoping some amazing burst of genius will come to you and you will have exactly the words to write? I'm having one of those moments right now. I continually come back to this blank screen and stare at it, hoping I can find the words that are amazing and inspiring and just the right words. Again and again, I leave the page blank, not writing anything. I have nothing that will inspire, nothing that will give hope or leave a mark on someone's life. I don't have answers, and I don't have anything to give. I am in this place, trying to come up with something, anything, to give that might be of worth. But that's the thing. I am trying to find something I can give that is of worth. But I don't have to bring anything. Just as I am, God takes me in. I don't have to have the right words, because God knows what is on my heart. I don't have to have all the answers, because He does. I don't have to come up with something worthy, because He just wants me, all of me. I am worthy. I don't need to wait until I have something to give, I can come as I am. As I am, empty, broken, with nothing to give. I can come and give Him my heart, give Him everything I have inside me, all of those feelings I can't put into words, all of those thoughts that haven't been voiced, all those questions I've never asked, all of those hopes and dreams and passions that lay unawakened inside of me. Like that song you usually hear around Christmas. What can I give Him, poor as I am? What can I give Him, as empty and confused and wordless as I am? Maybe when I'm full-er, maybe when I sort things out, maybe when I have the right words. But there it is, that tiny voice. Come as you are, it says. You don't have to have all the right words, just come as you are. You don't have to have anything to give, just give me your heart.
'What can I give Him, Poor as I am?
If I were a shepherd, I would bring Him a lamb
If I were a wise man, I would sure do my part
So What can I give Him?
I'll give Him my heart'

Guess what?

Ok, there's not really a story here, but some exciting news. I got my learners today!!! I could have gotten them in November, but I was kind of lazy and didn't want to drive in the winter anyway. So, I got my leaners now. Very exciting news!

Open Hands

Sometimes, when you stop holding so tightly to the things of your life, when you loosen your hold and trust that God has it all under control, things start to happen. It might not even be a big thing. It might be something tiny that you are holding on to because, for some reason, you think you can do it better then God. I know, it might not be the smartest the smartest thing someone has ever done, but I can't say I'm innocent. I, too, at times have thought that I could run my own life better then God could. Big mistake. I was holding onto the things in my life, holding onto everything I could to try and stay in control of my own life. I didn't trust that God would be who He said He would be and do what He said He would do. I thought that I knew just where my life should go and just what should happen. I knew that God has plans for me, but I thought that I could do it better. Do I need to say I was wrong? God has plans for me that are BIGGER and BETTER then the plans I could ever have for myself. If I was planning my own life, I know I would mess up. I can't see the future. Even if it doesn't make any sense right now, maybe it's because God has better plans for me for my future, and I just don't see it yet. I realized that sometimes, when you open your hands and give everything to God, your hopes and dreams and plans and wants and desires, He might just put something in your empty hands. You never know what might happen if you give it to God. It might be something better then you ever imagined. It might be something that could only happen when you have empty hands, and aren't clinging to those plans you have for your life. When you open your hands and give it to God, He might just put something in your empty hands.

Rule Number...

Rule Number 1 is don't worry about the things that God has under control. Rule number 2 is that God has everything under control.

Welcome to the world, Baby Maeryn

Welcome to the world, baby Maeryn Julienne! Nancy Rue's a grandma! That's right, her granddaughter, baby Maeryn, was born on Friday afternoon, weighing 8 pounds 4 1/2 ounces. So welcome to this world, baby Maeryn. You are one very blessed, very beautiful and very very loved baby girl. I can't wait to see where this world will take you, sweet baby.

Learning of baby Maeryn's birth seems like a good way to start off what I was originally going to post about today, new beginings. I was thinking today about how many blessings I have in my own life. I was thinking about how people have come into my life that have shown me love in new ways and blessed my life in ways I could have never imagined. and I was thinking about how, no matter what happens to me in this life, there are two things that can't be taken from me. No one can take away who I am, who I know I am in my heart, and the faith and relationship I have with Jesus. I learned that I need to give everything I am to God, daily, and be re-born. I know that no matter where I go, I am never alone. and that after the rain, there will be sunshine. It's there, just beyond the clouds. Things have changed in my life. God has brought people into my life I probably wouldn't have picked to be there if I had done it myself, but who have blessed my life in ways I could have never imagined. They are showing me God's love in a very real way. All I can say is "Thank you."

Things would have gone different if I was writing the script for my own life. But after the rain, there is sunshine. As I sit and think about my life, looking back now, I wouldn't have changed it. The things that happened before only make me realize how blessed I am to have the things I have now, and appreciate them more. There are amazing people in my life who believe in me. there are people in my life who are showing me God's love. and I know that, no matter what happens, I am not alone. I have people who love me, and a God who loves me and will never leave me. Even if I have lost everything, I have not lost God. This is a new begining. I can't wait to see what will happen in my life. I am excited and optimistic. I have found blessings in unexpected places. All I can say is "Thank you," Because I am over whelmed with all the blessings I am experiencing. After the storm, there is sunshine. I know that storms will come again in my life. but I know that, no matter what the storms bring, there is nothing that can seperate me from the love of God. That's enough to carry me through. I can rest in His arms. I can be surrounded by the wonderful people He has brought into my life. and I can rest knowing that there will always be sunshine beyond the clouds. I am set free, and I can have a new begining. So, baby Maeryn, let's start this journey of new life together, basking in blessings and surrounded by love. Because no matter what, we will always be daughters of the King, and we will always be loved. Nothing, not even the storms, can change that

Just Say Thank You

"I don't try to figure it all out. When I'm in trouble, I just say, "Please God." And when He shows up, I just say, "Thank you."

I find it comforting, knowing that I don't have to have the words. I like knowing that God knows my heart and He doesn't need me to try and explain it. I find peace in the fact that I am never alone in what I am going through. I might not be able to explain how I'm feeling, and that's ok. God get's that, and He knows my heart. All I have to say is "Please God." He knows what I'm talking about. He knows exactly what I mean when I say those two simple words. God will just show up and do His God thing. All I have to say is please. When God shows up, like He promises He will, I just say "Thank you." Those simple words are all I have to say.
I've been through one of those situations recently. I had no words, and I didn't know how to express what I was feeling. So I said, "Please God." I said "Please," And waited for God to show up. And He did. He showed up and did things I could have never hoped for. I heard His voice, Felt His arms holding me up and giving me strength. I didn't have to do this anymore. I could let God do His thing, and find comfort in knowing that, whatever happened, it would be for the best. God knows the plans He has for me, plans to prosper me and not to harm me, to give me hope and a future. He knows what I need, what I want, and what's best for me. and He loves me. He's not going to let something happen that's not part of His big plan for my life. When I finally got the answers, I said "Thank you." I was amazed, yet again, by how God had worked His power in my life. When I didn't know, He did. When I wasn't sure, He was. When I was confused and wondering, God knew.
So I challenge you
next time you have no words, say please, and wait for God to show up. And when He does, which He will, just say Thank you. That's all you need to do, keep saying please and thank-you.
Funny that what your mother taught you when you were little would work for more then just being polite.