So, a little while ago I was asked to do an interview for Ashley Mays. She's a writer - She used to write for a magazine for Christian girls I used to read called Brio - and now she has a blog. She's quite an amazing person, and it was a lot of fun, and an honor, to be interviewed for her blog. She did an amazing job with this interview, and I hope you have as much fun reading it as I did making it!
http://ashleywritesagain.blogspot.ca/2012/05/meet-alisha-teen-living-with-chronic.html
Thursday, May 31, 2012
Monday, May 28, 2012
Music on a Monday ~ Dark Side
There are no words to describe finding this song today, and finding out it said the words I never could.
Sunday, May 27, 2012
Together
I've been trying my hand at poetry. I don't know if I'm very good at it, but I'm finding I love it. I'm writing everywhere, from jotting down notes in my cell phone to sitting at the computer and typing and letting my soul find it's voice once again. So here's something I wrote today
With sunshine in our hair and sunburns gracing our shoulders
With laughter, and jokes made and drinks shared
With hope in our hearts and smiles on our faces
With twinkling eyes and devilish smiles
With a little girl grabbing your skirt and laughing, her eyes dancing as you pull her into your arms
While we scream and laugh at bugs and fish and make jokes about the future
Because we can, you know, because we are still young
We are here, on the brink of becoming something marvelous
For some of us, we are here in these final days of high school, before we set off on a new adventure
For others, we are counting down the days until the school bell rings for the last time and we are set free
With longing in our souls and our eyes set on the horizon
But today, we are together
In this day, our hands are joined and our laughter still mingles together as it echoes out across the park
We are together, separate beings yet part of something bigger then we can hold in our hands
The future is so uncertain and everything in our lives is changing, yet we are still here
As we were the summer before, with our heads held high and our hands united
And as we are on our journey of becoming, as the future holds different things for each and every one of us, we are also here, as a group of people who formed this friendship that can’t be described by mere words
This friendship that has withstood hours squished together on a bus and reaching out and stepping out
This friendship that has been my anchor as the storms of this life pull me, as we have ministered to each other in times of heartbreak and tragedy and in hope
We are more than friends, they are family
And as we stand here on the cusp of becoming, we are together
The future is coming and for every one of us it holds something different
And as we welcome in summer with our heads held high, and hope in our hearts, we are together
With sunshine in our hair and sunburns gracing our shoulders
With laughter, and jokes made and drinks shared
With hope in our hearts and smiles on our faces
With twinkling eyes and devilish smiles
With a little girl grabbing your skirt and laughing, her eyes dancing as you pull her into your arms
While we scream and laugh at bugs and fish and make jokes about the future
Because we can, you know, because we are still young
We are here, on the brink of becoming something marvelous
For some of us, we are here in these final days of high school, before we set off on a new adventure
For others, we are counting down the days until the school bell rings for the last time and we are set free
With longing in our souls and our eyes set on the horizon
But today, we are together
In this day, our hands are joined and our laughter still mingles together as it echoes out across the park
We are together, separate beings yet part of something bigger then we can hold in our hands
The future is so uncertain and everything in our lives is changing, yet we are still here
As we were the summer before, with our heads held high and our hands united
And as we are on our journey of becoming, as the future holds different things for each and every one of us, we are also here, as a group of people who formed this friendship that can’t be described by mere words
This friendship that has withstood hours squished together on a bus and reaching out and stepping out
This friendship that has been my anchor as the storms of this life pull me, as we have ministered to each other in times of heartbreak and tragedy and in hope
We are more than friends, they are family
And as we stand here on the cusp of becoming, we are together
The future is coming and for every one of us it holds something different
And as we welcome in summer with our heads held high, and hope in our hearts, we are together
Friday, May 25, 2012
Swingset of tears
"Are you crying?""Kind of?"
"Why?" he asked
"Cause I'm just - I want to go to Amsterdam and i want him to tell me what happens when the book is over and I just don't want my particular life, and also the sky is depressing me, and there is this old swing set out here..."
"I must see this swingset of tears immediatly," he said, I"ll be over in 20 minutes."
I was reminded of this at supper, as I looked out the window at the neighbor's swingset, and I could feel myself wanting to cry. It's been that kind of day, the kind where I start crying at swingsets.
"We've got to do something about this swingset," He said, "I'm telling you it's ninety percent of the problem."
"Headline?" he asked
"Swing Set needs home," I said
"Desperate lonely swing set needs loving home," He said
"Lonely, vaguely pedophilic swing set seeks the butts of children," I said
In the end, we settled on this:
Desperate lonely swingset needs home
One swing set, well worn but structurally sound seeks new home. Make memories with your kid or kids so that someday he or she or they will look into the backyard and feel the ache of sentimentality as desperatly as I did this afternoon. It's all fragile and fleeting, dear reader, but with this swingset your child(ren) will be introduced to the ups and downs of human life gently and safely and may also learn the most importent lesson of all; no matter how hard you kick, no matter how high you get, you can't go all the way around.
Quotes taken from The Fault in Our Stars by John Green
Thursday, May 24, 2012
Filling the hole ~ Part 2
I'm not sure how to write this post either. But I want to.
I'm filling the hole with music - this hole inside of me caused by word-less-ness- and I'm filling the hole with dancing.
I don't understand a lot of things right now. All these hopeful and heartbreaking things stirring around inside of my heart like tiny birds waking from their sleep and breaking their egg and seeing a whole new world. It's like that, and it's different, and it's confusing, and in this time of pain and discovery God is teaching me.
You remember in the Bible, when David danced before The Lord and his wife got embarrassed and David said, "I'll become even more undignified than this?" I think that's a similar kind of dancing; that raw, unhinged, primal desire just to move. To physically respond to the moment 1
It's like that. In this place where I am, when everything is new and different and confusing and I don't understand and I can't find the words to write and I'm exhausted and hopeful and full of all these conflicting emotions, it is in that place that God is doing something new and wonderful. I like the verse in Hosea 2: 14, where it says "Therefore I am now going to allure her; I will lead her into the wilderness and speak tenderly to her."
It's like that. In this wilderness I'm in, He had lead me here. He has lead me to this place where I am stripped of everything, of my health, of my ability to turn words into beautiful things, of my strength, of everything I thought was stable, of people in my life. He has brought me to this wilderness where I have nothing but Him, and it is here that He speaks tenderly to me.
And that kind of beauty, in God getting down on my level and speaking tenderly to me and giving me glimpses of hope and of Himself, that requires a response.
I'm filling the hole with music - this hole inside of me caused by word-less-ness- and I'm filling the hole with dancing.
I don't understand a lot of things right now. All these hopeful and heartbreaking things stirring around inside of my heart like tiny birds waking from their sleep and breaking their egg and seeing a whole new world. It's like that, and it's different, and it's confusing, and in this time of pain and discovery God is teaching me.
You remember in the Bible, when David danced before The Lord and his wife got embarrassed and David said, "I'll become even more undignified than this?" I think that's a similar kind of dancing; that raw, unhinged, primal desire just to move. To physically respond to the moment 1
It's like that. In this place where I am, when everything is new and different and confusing and I don't understand and I can't find the words to write and I'm exhausted and hopeful and full of all these conflicting emotions, it is in that place that God is doing something new and wonderful. I like the verse in Hosea 2: 14, where it says "Therefore I am now going to allure her; I will lead her into the wilderness and speak tenderly to her."
It's like that. In this wilderness I'm in, He had lead me here. He has lead me to this place where I am stripped of everything, of my health, of my ability to turn words into beautiful things, of my strength, of everything I thought was stable, of people in my life. He has brought me to this wilderness where I have nothing but Him, and it is here that He speaks tenderly to me.
And that kind of beauty, in God getting down on my level and speaking tenderly to me and giving me glimpses of hope and of Himself, that requires a response.
1. Taken from Natalie Lloyd
Wednesday, May 23, 2012
Filling the hole...
I've been wanting to write for a while, but not ever finding the right words. Some things are hard to write about, some things I just can't find the words to write about the way I want to. Some things don't even make sense in my own mind, so I have no idea how I'm going to write them down on paper. So I'm filling this hole in my chest - this hole where words used to be- with music. I'm playing music and making music and falling in love with beautiful music. Some of these un-word-able things are hopeful things, little tiny things stirring in my heart and making me smile, or wonder, or happy.
There's hopeful things, and there's heartbreaking things, and there's things I can't even wrap my head around yet to try and figure out how to describe. So, on this rainy Wednesday, I'm learning how to fill this hole in my chest where words used to be. I'm learning how to feel, wordlessly, using music.
Friday, May 18, 2012
7 Quick Takes Volume 6
1. It seems like I haven't written/blogged in a while. Every time I think I should write a post and try to sit down and write one, nothing comes out ~ well nothing coherent anyway. Like Augustus Waters says in The Fault in Our Stars "My thoughts are stars I cannot fathom into constellations."
2. On the note of The Fault in Our Stars, I'm reading it for the third time since I got it about a week ago. I literally can't put it down! Everytime I read it, I discover something new to fall in love with, or fall in love with the same thing more and more. I know there are lots of people who've read this book, but it feels like my book. It's my story written in those pages. The thoughts that Hazel voices are my thoughts.
3. I got my hair cut on Monday. And my whole plan was to take a picture today and upload it onto the blog, but I'm too lazy to go dig for my camera and the cord, so I'm just going to describe it. It's short, and I think it kinda looks like Michelle Williams meets Kiera Knightley when she had short hair. But that's just me.
4. Grey's Anatomy and Private Practice season finale's were this week. That kind of made me sad, because... well it just did. They were both really intense finales. And I cried... in both of them. I can't wait to see what will happen next season, but, alas, I will have to wait. That's when I'm thankful for seasons on DVD!
5. I've had a couple of really bad nights, and days. And I kind of hate saying that I had a really bad night/day, but I did. In Campus Church on Wednesday, one of the things the preacher was talking about was God's call on our lives, and He had 5 points. All throughout the time I was listening, I kept hearing "I have you here for a reason." And He does. God has me here, right where I am, for a reason. And, in someway, He is going to use me. In someway I can't even see yet, this trial that is breaking my heart and taking everything so I have nothing left, He's going to use that. He's asking me, "Will I follow, even now? Will I still trust Him?" And the answer is yes, but only by His grace.
6. I am so excited it's the long weekend. I am really in need of a break. I keep thinking "Well, just make it past Tuesday and your busy streak will, hopefully, be done for a bit." But what about today? What about these 4 wonderful days off I've been given? So I'm going to rest
7. Can I tell you a secret? I'm going to be ok. Did you know that? I don't know if I did, and if I did I don't know if I've been clinging to God's promise that He knows the plans He has for me. But I'm going to be ok, no matter what happens. Everything is going to be ok, cause He's got the whole world in His hands. And In His Hands in the best place to be.
2. On the note of The Fault in Our Stars, I'm reading it for the third time since I got it about a week ago. I literally can't put it down! Everytime I read it, I discover something new to fall in love with, or fall in love with the same thing more and more. I know there are lots of people who've read this book, but it feels like my book. It's my story written in those pages. The thoughts that Hazel voices are my thoughts.
3. I got my hair cut on Monday. And my whole plan was to take a picture today and upload it onto the blog, but I'm too lazy to go dig for my camera and the cord, so I'm just going to describe it. It's short, and I think it kinda looks like Michelle Williams meets Kiera Knightley when she had short hair. But that's just me.
4. Grey's Anatomy and Private Practice season finale's were this week. That kind of made me sad, because... well it just did. They were both really intense finales. And I cried... in both of them. I can't wait to see what will happen next season, but, alas, I will have to wait. That's when I'm thankful for seasons on DVD!
5. I've had a couple of really bad nights, and days. And I kind of hate saying that I had a really bad night/day, but I did. In Campus Church on Wednesday, one of the things the preacher was talking about was God's call on our lives, and He had 5 points. All throughout the time I was listening, I kept hearing "I have you here for a reason." And He does. God has me here, right where I am, for a reason. And, in someway, He is going to use me. In someway I can't even see yet, this trial that is breaking my heart and taking everything so I have nothing left, He's going to use that. He's asking me, "Will I follow, even now? Will I still trust Him?" And the answer is yes, but only by His grace.
6. I am so excited it's the long weekend. I am really in need of a break. I keep thinking "Well, just make it past Tuesday and your busy streak will, hopefully, be done for a bit." But what about today? What about these 4 wonderful days off I've been given? So I'm going to rest
7. Can I tell you a secret? I'm going to be ok. Did you know that? I don't know if I did, and if I did I don't know if I've been clinging to God's promise that He knows the plans He has for me. But I'm going to be ok, no matter what happens. Everything is going to be ok, cause He's got the whole world in His hands. And In His Hands in the best place to be.
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