Thursday, May 26, 2011

Little Bits

I'm just a little bit torn today. Just a little bit upset with myself, just a little bit upset with life, just a little bit needy. I'm just a little bit hurt and just a little bit happy. Just a little bit peaceful, a little bit content, and a little bit anxious. I'm a little bit wanting and a little bit giving and a little bit hoping. A little bit sick and a little bit hurting but a little bit trying and a little bit fighting.
I'm full of little bits right now. I'm a little bit of everything today. All these little bits, all crammed together in my body, fighting for space, for time, for thought. Each little bit is screaming, their little tiny hands raised, their cries echoing "Pick me, pick me." For a moment, I do. I don't mean to, but absentmindedly I pick the one that is the loudest, the one whose hand is raised the highest, the one who is yipping and snapping at my heels for attention. For a moment, I pet that little thing, letting it curl up in my lap. I think about whatever that little bit is, think about the circumstance that made me feel that way or the things I'm wanting or needing or hoping for. It seems the happy little bits, the content little bits and the peaceful little bits are the quietest. They are the one's in the back, politely waiting for their turn to be remembered. So today, I'm gonna choose. Just for a little while, I am gonna go to the back of the pack and pick up the happy piece, the content piece, the peaceful piece. I'm going to let them bring back the memories they hold and smile. Just for a little while, I am going to ignore those other pieces, the pieces screaming for my attention and snapping at me heels, and I am going to sit at the back of the pack with Happy, Content and Peace. Just for a little while...

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