Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Run with the Wild Horses


I watched this video and almost cried. I remember a time, last year, before I got diagnosed, when I would want to go riding but the thought of getting out and saddling up was enough to make me want to go crawl back into bed. If I did get out there, by the time I was saddled up all I wanted was to go back to bed, and if I did make it to going for a short ride, I came inside exhausted and in pain.
It was that winter Freedom (My horse) got sick, and I was sick, and I wondered how either of us was going to make it through that winter. I remember whispering to him one day as I hand fed him to try to help him gain weight that we were going to make it through this winter, both of us, that we were going to be fine, that we were going to make it.
By some miracle he made it through that winter, and so did I.
In early October, I went out to see him at the lease where he was being kept. After searching for a few minutes, I finally saw him, running through the pasture. The other horses being kept there began to follow him, and they all began to run, and Freedom - the horse who nobody knew if he was going to make it through the winter - was leading the herd.
I made it through that winter too. I made it through the spring when I felt like I was losing everything, the summer of knowing but not knowing, and getting diagnosed. I'm here now, I'm making it.
I made it through the winter, and spring is coming. I can feel it, feel the transition that is taking place. I'm getting ready to run.

No comments: